This isn’t my university classroom…but don’t worry, I’m just as unproductive.

When embarking on a new project or adventure, we always start out with an inflated sense of ambition. At the outset the sky is the limit and the slate is clean- the possibilities are endless! I might even cure cancer while I’m building this here toolbox/cosmetics kit (yes, I did build that in my 8th grade shop class, and that’s what the shop teacher called it). Shortly after the situation starts to unfold, you suddenly find that you are up to your neck in alligators, and thus you start adjusting lowering your expectations. I am no different. Today’s illustration? My quest to learn Wolof (the language most widely spoken in Senegal).

 Father Dougal McGuire isn’t the only one who sometimes mixes up these two concepts

Not long after arriving in Dakar, I grew tired of answering the daily barrage of basic Wolof greetings. Actually, it wasn’t that I was answering the greetings- it was more like I grew tired of responding to each Senegalese person with a dumb look that said “I have no idea what you are saying.”

So I took a class, but I never got as far as I had originally envisioned. This is largely because I get around quite well with my French, thus there is no pressing need for me to learn a language that is only spoken in two-ish countries. Sure learning Wolof is still of interest, but after ten months of fighting off my own personal alligators it is no longer a “do or die” goal. There just aren’t enough hours in the day.

But fear not, I have recently recommenced Wolof lessons: I go once a week for two hours. While I recognize that I will never become fluent at this rate, it at least keeps me somewhat anchored to my original objective. 

So for this round of classes I’m still not hitting the academic ball out of the park- but I blame my pedigree as a naval officer for this inadequacy. You see, my fantastic capacity to multi-task (or is it really ADHD?) results in my inability to focus on only one subject at a time. To wit: each week in my Wolof class, I look around to see what else is in the room that I might find interesting. Let me show you some of my favorite departure points for distraction. 

Do any of these look familiar?

It would appear that my classroom doubles as a ghetto Blockbuster Video!

I wonder if any of these are dubbed in Wolof. I might learn this language faster if I knew how to say “It’s K-K-K-Ken, c-c-c-coming to k-k-k-kill me!”

I have no idea what this movie is about, but something tells me that it is very funny for all the wrong reasons…

I haven’t seen this movie in so long, but as I eyeball this case every week, I realize that I really want to tune in next time I am recovering from the Irish flu.

So there you have it. A window into what should not even be a blip on the radar of a proper language student.  Maybe this week I’ll ask my excellent teacher how to say “I’m a bad student” in Wolof. I just might do that- but between you and me, I would probably already know this if I actually paid attention to my studies.

FULL DISCLOSURE: I actually wrote this blog entry on the back of my statistics assignment as I sat in class and listened to my bored professor talk about formulas that I will never study voluntarily. I’m not sure if I am proud of this fact, but it does further illustrate my point.