A few days ago I woke up back home on Cape Cod. I went out for a run on Surf Drive as I like to do, slogged through the humidity at 6AM along part of the Falmouth Road Race course. On my way back home, I stopped to run a few errands. I waited in line on Main Street at the bakery, filled up the car and then got some groceries. Normal town stuff.
Once I got back to the house, I noticed in the driveway that we had a skinny newspaper sitting in a blue translucent bag. Strange, considering that we’re not on any delivery route. But I picked the paper up anyway and saw that it was a free edition of the Falmouth Enterprise. A clever way to bring in new subscribers to distribution.
Now that I’m an adult, I’ve got more of a vested interest in stuff like the town paper. In the past, I might only peek inside if there was mention of a Megan-related event (a graduation, or a track meet). Now, I wanted to see topics our town found worthy of print.
I know it’s all relative, but life as of late feels super overstuffed. My phone alone contains more compelling attractions than I have time for, and we’re not even getting into the real life in front of you activities that you must or should interact with every day. I wonder about the simpler times. What was Falmouth like before we all grew up and fashioned it into what we have now?
If any of you do still get a newspaper dropped into your yard, I recommend you flip to the “Once Upon A Time” section. It’s the part that gives you a glimpse into what was going on decades ago. Look:
100 years ago in Falmouth:
- Motorists wishing to ship their “machine” to the Vineyard, ferries are booked and you will need to wait.
- New prohibition regulations covering the distribution of wine for religious purpose are almost done.
- Officer L.T. Robbins is pissed off about cars speeding up and down Main Street and is “determined to stop them”. He complains about these ding dongs making a U-Turn in the street and to do it where you are supposed to down at the Village Green.
75 years ago in Falmouth
- Mr & Mrs Fennessey went $9.14 over budget for their two-week vacation in Falmouth. They wanted to spend $150.
50 years ago in Falmouth
- Fifteen applicants were vying for a single license to run a package store (booze). The number of liquor licenses were based on a summer population of 35,000 people in town.
Like my morning errands, all of this is just town stuff. On their own, completely unremarkable in their day. Sure, some things have changed—like the number of people populating Falmouth in the summertime (today the year-round population is about 31,000 and in the summer it’s more like 100K). Also, prohibition is out the window and I am pretty sure that they upped the number of liquor licenses in the past 50 years.
Yesterday I took a drive over to Mashpee with my brother. Traveling on Sandwich Road, we were moving at a completely acceptable speed when we observed a car in front of us suddenly take it upon himself to speed up over the double yellow line and overtake the car in front of him. By the time we reached the traffic light and turned right onto Route 151, it was clear that Mr. Speedy hadn’t made much headway. My brother and I looked ahead and unanimously proclaimed him an idiot.
You like to think that certain efforts are not futile, and that things do change. In the grand scheme of things, I do believe that this is a more healthy way to live. But since that morning when I paged through the Enterprise, I’ve been thinking about Officer L.T. Robbins from one hundred years ago. While the “machines” may have evolved, our driving habits more or less have not. People still drive faster than they should around town, and the ferries to Martha’s Vineyard—they too continue to operate at max capacity.
As far as things changing, of course the population counts in the 21st century have mushroomed much as one would expect. You are more likely to spend $159.14 on a single trip to Stop & Shop rather your entire two-week holiday. Some things simply have to change—much is the requirements of our modern life of flax milk and 12-packs of Lipton Iced Tea.
Last year we won a $20 gift card for a tavern in Woods Hole that is probably pretty good. My grandmother was born in Woods Hole, and I love going down there. But the problem in this southwest corner of Falmouth is that parking is a pain in the ass. I understand the reasoning, but everywhere is metered and in the summer it is very crowded—so while I don’t mind paying to park, I do mind looping around for eternity hoping that a space will open up.
Before I folded up the newspaper, I did take a look at the Letters to the Editor. There was a mixed bag of topics (everything from COVID to people complaining about hearts being painted on rocks). The one that caught my eye though was an irritated resident who claims to have been parking in Woods Hole for the past 45 years without issue. He’s just received a $50 ticket for the front of his car hanging over the line in the parallel parking spaces, and he is unhappy: “If the town is so hard-pressed to make money, they should just arm the meter guy with a taser and have him zap residents and take their wallets. Over the Line indeed.”
I’m sure this North Falmouth resident fired off his letter feeling a tiny bit better after venting, as well as patting himself on the back for his zinging wittiness. But I also looked at his letter and suspected that 100 years from now, somebody will be submitting the missive for printing under the Once Upon a Time heading. At that stage, parking tickets will probably be $5000 dollars and they’ll have finally built a bridge to the Vineyard. I kinda hope not—but then again, this won’t be my problem as I will have long since checked out. I’ll enjoy what we have for town stuff right now and allow those future Cape Codders deal with whatever they’ve got going on at the time.